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And just when I thought I had a problem with SETI....

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  • And just when I thought I had a problem with SETI....

    I find this thread on ars.
    Sad part is that I fit a lot more that I am willing to admit.

    You Know you are a DC freak When...
    1. You look at every computer that dosen't run a DC project and yell
    2. You print out you stats on your bedsheets
    3. You spend hours just watching how complete your WU is
    4. You buy a new computer every 6 months or sooner
    5. You get angry when someone shuts down their computer
    6. You spend more that 10 hours a week in the DCA
    7. You run you own stats engine
    8. You build a monster (or two)
    9. You rent a larger apartment so there is more room for your growing farm.
    10. You ask the landlord for a 100 amp CKT so you can run your computers.
    11. food or new cpu? is a valid question
    12. You put all your pennies in a Jar labeled "New Computer #241"
    13. You paycheck goes 25% for computer 25% for savings 50% for living
    14. you decide on the new cpu over food. (see #11)
    15. You check on other teams forums
    16. The local college sends you a request for computer time on your cluster.
    17. IBM sees you as a threat to BIG BLUE
    18. Your house doesn't need a furnace, and you keep the windows open in the winter to cool your house down.
    18. On Christmas Eve, you, your family and friends gather around the home farm because :
    a. it is the warmest place in the house
    b. you can keep an eye on the work unit being done
    c. you can explain to them the importance of the work the farm is doing
    d. at midnight, you can present to each of them their personal nodes on your farm.
    e. you can turn to your farm for comfort after they tell you what they think of your presents.
    19. The power company sends you a christmas card every year.
    20. You make sure that you are at the computer for the next stats update
    21. you are able to contribute to a thread like this
    22. If you're a sysadmin w/ borg permission, you evaluate new purchases as to how quickly they crunch a specific project
    23. You have a farm on more than one project.
    24. The first thing you do upon waking up is check your boxen.
    25. The second thing you do upon waking is read the DCA.
    26. You get assimilated into your project and hold five years of cache
    27. You run two other projects idle in case some of them go down
    #28. You dream about new ways to present stats.
    #29. You start measuring time not in hours, but production.
    #30. You can't fall asleep without hearing the reassuring whine of cooling fans.
    31 You borg all of your friends' computers after offering to help with upgrades.
    #32 You purchase UPSs to insure that your computers suffer less downtime
    33 You wake up 3 am, with this voice in your ears, saying: 'Don't worry, DC is nothing but a dream'. You jump out of your bed, switch on the monitor, call up the stats - and take a deep breath of relief ...
    #34 Your wife/GF/significant other is feeling neglected because all your time and $$ goes to maintaining/building your DC farm "baby"
    34 You know how many hours your system has been up but can't remember how old your child is.
    35- You haven't gone on a date in 5 years because all your money is spent on computer upgrades
    #36) You casually stop by work on the days off, to make sure the projects are running.
    #37) You save mini-dumps strategically, to scare your opponents.
    #38) You draw satisfaction from network activity LEDs blinking
    39. You verify that a pile of boarts and cpus is still running by waiting for the tell tale flash of the disk LED's as the client writes to the checkpoint.
    40. When you look at a bunch of old machines you make a mental note of what project might run where.
    41 Your wife/GF/significant other has left you years ago because you have only computers in mind all the time
    42 You haven't noticed yet
    43. When your husband or boyfriend don't mind going shopping with you because they know where you are going.
    44. You are woken at night by the client not writing its periodic checkpoint files.
    45. You actually get up in the middle of the night to check that every part of your farm is still running, and at benchmark speed.
    46. You know all the benchmark speeds by heart.
    47. You have started a DC forum thread called "You Know you are a DC freak When...".
    48. You can add five or more reasons to a DC forum thread called "You Know you are a DC freak When...".
    49 You're woken up at 5AM with the smell of burning PSU and you change it without even opening your eyes.
    50 You've RMAed so much Ram that you've memorized Crucials telephone number and address
    51. You run a DC team
    52. You have your Seti individual stats page set as the default home page on all your web browsers
    53. If a friend/family member doesn't want to spend the money to upgrade, you'll do it for free so that your hidden dc client will run faster.
    54. You mistake this thread for a DC "How-to" FAQ
    55) You mirror the stats on your computer so you can view them from work/school.
    56) You write stats for those mirrors.
    57) You go into withdrawls during stats/WU outages
    58 Whilst doing weekend work, you ensure that all your co-worker's machines are doing DC even whilst they're logged on and helping you - this in order to avoid a single moment's loss of weekend production
    59 You ensure that you're always the last one out of the office thus ensuring that as many of your colleagues' boxen as possible recommence crunching overnight/at the weekend
    60. When you have a power failure, you have to bring each system individually online, otherwise, if they all came up at once you would overload the main circuit breaker
    61. you buy the latest game but don't play it because it would reduce your box's crunching rate.
    63 - You only check the stats to ensure your systems are still up, 'cuz it's for the Science, not the stats.
    62 You maintain a price/performance spreadsheet broken down by project performance, watching for the "sweet spots".
    64 You buy new hardware because its on sale, and you may need it in the future
    65 You invite complete strangers over to your house to party hearty, for the sole reason that they're fellow DC addicts
    66 You've completed & returned more DC results than +99% of of the entire worldwide DC population, and you're STILL considered a "small fry" within your own team's ranks
    67. So much light is generated from the LED's on your farm the neighbors have complained that they no longer know if its day or night.
    68 You are watching the best musical currently running in the country and all you can think of is how to beat DPC in eccp-109.
    69 The Power Company has installed a commercial electricity meter on the side of your home
    70 While house shopping you care more about the distance to the telephone central office and power generation station than the quality of schools and crime rate
    71: When you're playing a game, the following question becomes valid: "Why am I doing this, I could be using the cycles for -insert project of choice here-"
    72 You realize your children skipped their lessons, because the DC client running on their terminal didn't deliver in time
    73 You purchase a power adapter for your laptop to run in your car so it can keep crunching.
    74 You look outside and see the powerline running to your house glowing red.
    75 You are the cause for the rolling blackouts!
    76 You have to run your air conditioner in the dead of winter
    77. You get upset with the corporate policy of password protected screen savers (biggest waste of computing cycles).
    83. You create a webpage with the "You know You're a DC Freak When..." list on it
    84 San Jose International airport representatives ask you to turn your computers off at night because the airline pilots are confused about which lights are the landing lights and which ones are your computer's LEDs.
    85 You make sure to be the last to leave work, making sure all of your co-workers machines are left on for the night to crunch your project
    86 You plan a 500 square foot addition to your home and 250 sq ft of the addition is devoted to your "server room "
    87. When you can come up with reasons to post here.
    88. You ask permission in the job interview to borg the corporate machines
    89. You have become mesmerized by watching WUs accumulate in a queue.
    90. You time your departure from home or work to coincide with a stats update
    91. You can spend 3 hours tweaking a system to squeeze an extra 2% out of the CPU..but you balk at spending 3 hours bringing your car for servicing.
    93. You have a picture of your pharm on your desk at work but none of your wife/family!
    94. Your wife is as good at making sure SETI is still running on her own system as you are on yours
    95. You ask if there is a client you can run on your TI-92plus96. DC has actually caused you to bark like a dog, chase cats, and howl at the moon ... in REAL LIFE
    97. Your DC team has a pinup babe
    98. The team you belong to has more computing power then most nations.
    99. You are doing the news for several dc teams
    100. You've spent more than $100 giving away gifts, bribes, prizes, souveniers, and other

  • #2
    101. Your DC team's home thread has outgrown the server's capacity, and you've had to repeatedly split & continue it.
    101. You are fully aware of #1 - #100. You'ld subscribe to most of it. You are still convinced, there's nothing wrong with you :-) get annoied that only TLC logo is up thee and not -insert other team here-'s
    104. You quit our boy scout troop because you can't borg the scoutmaster's machines
    105. You count up the amount you save with coupons and add it to the amount you can sped on computers a month!
    106. You consider getting a third 1.5Kva rackmount UPS to give yourself evenmore uptime during power troubles even though you already have more UPS capacity than your work!
    107. You hate taking vacations because you have to take down the home part of your pharm while you are away!
    108. You withdraw all of your savings twice a year for a new box. (See #13 above).
    109. You have a gasoline generator out back to take over during power failures. (Come on everyone has this, right?)
    110. You stare at the stats screen waiting for the update even though you know it isn't going to happen for another three hours.
    108) You read this thread instead of the web-page, because you want "the up-to-date stats".
    111. You let out a heavy sigh every time you glance at the server racks at your job.
    112. You spend more time laying out an action plan to convince your employer to borg the computer labs than you spend working on your resume'.
    113. You get caught borging the computers at the local Gateway store.
    114. You borg your Grandma's computer, and when she finds the program you tell her it is a super advanced virus program. (I didnt really do this)
    #115 You dream of being in charge of installing software for a major OEM
    116 You continue to buy parts from the agora to assemble the next DC machine even though you are unemployed!!!!
    117 You enjoy reading this thread because all the points mentioned are sounding so familiar to you.
    118. You write a song to help urge your team on.
    119. You have teammates who are crazy enough to sing it along with you, in public
    Your a Paramedic, your on a 911 emergency call. The Call happens to be in the testing and assembly area for HP/Compaq Computers. Your in a hurry, trying to help a very sick person and it's ALL you can do to keep your mind off the borging disk in you front left pocket ( next to your heart )
    121) You have a complete directory-hierarchy "/dc/" directly in root that you keep updated with all the newest clients, documentation and news items.
    122) You keep that just for your own perusal, not as a service to anybody
    123 You carry a business card CD-R that has a super simple one-click borg routine on it. In your back pocket, and you HAVE tested it in Comp-USA, PC-CLub, Fry's, Gateway County, Best Buy, Circuit City.....
    125-You just had HP onsite tech support service your laptop since you ran DC on it full time and the HS/FAN finally failed (grin)
    126 you build a stand w/ 120mm 110v fan in it for your laptop to stay cool while running DC! (and I have to admit, it is one of my most effective cooling mods)
    127. you still crunch on the laptop, even when on a site visit you have to wrap it with saran wrap for splash protection and the mill's ambient temp is about 110
    128. you do the above deliberately in hopes of frying the 750 so they have to replace it with a P4
    129. You rummage through your old computer parts, find a 486, put it back in working order and start to look for a DC project where it could be used. Never mind the electricity bill
    130. You cry when your wife phones to say the power went off at home 5 minutes after you left for work. And when the power is finally restored, she doesn't know the trick about turning PCs on one by one to save the circuit breaker tripping. It's what happens when you live out in the sticks.
    131. The first thing you do with a new OS is service a DC client so that it runs even while you install apps & reboot! Can't lose production time.
    132. You start running farms for other "users" just to add to the fun.
    133. You can hold an entire conversation with someone and just use terms like DC, WU production, queueing, borging and wasted cycles.
    134. You know _exactly_ how much CPU goes to waste in your office each day and what the total production of those wasted cycles would be if applied to DC Project X.
    135. When the project ends you feel betrayed, alone and have no idea what you should be doing now.
    136. You run stats sites for teams that you produce in.
    137. You run stats sites for teams you no longer produce in.
    138. You've sold items that at one time you cherished to feed your addic^H^H^H^H^Hhabit. (I haven't done this yet, but I'm in the works for it).
    139. Your reasoning for not adding a "real" firewall is that the 486 is too slow to crunch and route packets. Your ideal firewall is at least a Dual MP2200+.
    140. You have to start working lots of overtime to pay for the electricity bill that just tripled in the past 2 weeks.
    141. You can contribute 5+ items to this very thread in one post
    142. You start wishing someone would code DC clients for your cellphone, calculator, and PDA's, 'cause they'd still produce a few points, eventually.
    143. You make a lecture series for DC fit into every undergrad course you teach, then assign each undergrade to choose a DC project of their choice and borg campus machines to compare how well various hardware/software combinations run their chosen project (leaving the borged machines running after completion of the assignmet, of course).
    144. You recruit the most promising undergrads to work on a research project to develop the 'best" hardware farm solution for your favorite DC team.
    145. You can continue to think up reasons to add to this list
    146. You get your old 68040 mac connected to the internet to post in the DC forums, so you don't waste you other boxes computer time!
    147. You also connect it to crunch the 2 or 3 OGR units a day it will do!
    58) you're one of the top10-20 on your team
    148 - You're in the top 10-20 on more than one team/project
    149. You, personally, have more computing power than most nations
    150. You start comparing your personal output to entire teams, and realize that if you were to form a single-person team, it'd be in the top 10%
    151. To make more space for computers, you get rid of your furniture and make furniture out of computers.
    152. You extend the 'refurbish' time for a client PC by 2 days so you can really burn it in with a DC client.
    153. The number of machines undergoing 'refurbishment' increases. This is the "casual machine pool".
    154. With a sizeable #153 running, you pull a sickie & keep 'em crunching for an extra week.
    155. Because of '139. Your reasoning for not adding a "real" firewall is that the 486 is too slow to crunch and route packets. Your ideal firewall is at least a Dual MP2200+.' you do borg 1/2 a dozen firewalls for a net gain of 1164mHz. Then prepare a case study as to why Dual MP2200+'s is needed for firewalls.
    156. You upload all client logs to an SQL Server so you can use stats queries to prove machines that run DC last longer & have fewer problems. True in every sense
    157. You are actually weird enough to use SQL for anything DC related (Guilty as charged )
    160. You ran out of arguments, but you just can't take seeing this thread moving down to page two
    158. You can agree with anyone that says they want more power, as long as that power gets borged by you.

    159. You newest machine has the fastest processor available, yet it only has 64MB of ram, because your current project doesn't use much RAM.
    161. You have a party to celebrate your milestone of xxxx WU in y project, and give everyone a tour of the farm!
    162. You are so proud of your farm that you take pictures of it and put them up on a website for other DC freaks to view and admire
    163. Even worse, you make one website dedicated to that one farm
    164. You personally know the people who run the DC project
    165. And they privately give you cache for the gauntlet, enough that a single box would need six years to crunch it.
    166. You look at this thread first whenever you visit DCA

    167. You have this thread bookmarked
    168. You have your friends sign up on a disaster fan out call list to check farm status and room temps while your on vacation.
    170. You print out contact lists, user guides and manuals for friends prior to vacation for reduntant systems support and carry your (supposedly lost) beeper for the first time in years.
    171. You check for broadband or dialup access at each vacation hotel before you check if it has queen, king or single beds.
    172. You forget to tell the newspaper to hold service during vacation but remember to ask the airlines for a seat with a power jack.
    173. You call your friends with the intent of having them check if the iron is unplugged but ask if the battery backups are on line first.
    174. You have created your own DC project.
    175. When upgrading home machines, their use is second to your project.
    176. You don't have a single video card capable of 3D acceleration.
    169. You are so busy borging boxen, you forget how to count... unless it's counting your stats
    170. You get up before 5am GMT specifically to see what effect your dumpage has had on the last TVM update - and DR NNo's site is down


    • #3
      178. Getting up before 5am GMT to check dumpage means that you are still really asleep and fail to notice/read the prior numbers of points here
      179. your excuse for watercooling your CPUs is "honey, think of all the money we'll save when I pipe this into the water heater..."

      180. you install photovoltaic panels to your house plus a huge battery room to maintain your up time (really... it's just a big UPS system... honest)
      181 - You get divorced with an onerous dicree against you; but it's OK as your spouse doesn't want the computers anyway!
      182) You buy Cat5 by the mile.

      183) You don't own a hard disk bigger than the size of an OS and your project. (Or you only own one and have boards with bootable NICs.)

      184) When the power goes out, the neighbors ask to connect to one of your UPS units.

      185) Your residence has no heating system, only several strategically-placed boxen.
      186. You register for the forums after delaying for a year just to post in this thread
      187. Your farm draws so much juice your power company notified the DEA of a possible grow lab. Umm wrong kinda farm guys.... really
      #188. You begin planning elaborate heat sinking apparatus to hide your farm from DEA helicopters with infrared scanners
      189. Global warming is actually because of your farm, you just don't want to admit it
      190 The only reason you can justify another computer to the wife is so the kids can play on one, you can play on the other and you can secretly crunch DC projects on both.
      191 You crunch two different projects for rival teams
      192. You agree to give each of the kids and the wife their own PCs, in their own bedrooms - that way you don't take all the blame for the power bills And of course they crunch some project as a hidden service
      193. You need a nice case for a lan box, but don't want to spend the money, because it could be spent on another setup for your farm.

      194. You know there is still 5 minutes before the stats will update, but you start hitting the refresh button anyway.

      195. In the months after getting laid off from your job, you more then double the fire power of your home farm
      196) You know your team number better than your phone or social security number
      197) You have more processing power than the top teams put together
      198 In an effort to become a heavy hitter you went out and bought 20 barebones systems and forgot to pay the bills sending you 3 months in debt. And still don't have another computer to add to your farm
      199) You give up on trying to buy cat5 to match the decor of each room and just lay the stuff and cover it on the floor with duct tape.
      200) Your grandkids tell all of their friends that their grandmother is weird because she has more computers than all of the schools classroooms combined.
      201). You have a dual processor system and you join Team Atomic Milkshake [TAM] because you hear that muon1_background runs REALLY efficiently on Athlons and you can tell it to run dual threads

      202). When you see that it only uses 98% of available processor cycles, you run a second instance of muon1_background to soak up the slack
      203). You run it with 2 threads too
      204 You know what every work unit is called in every dc project and each of the top 10 teams for each project for the last 10 years
      #205 You get a half year long depression when DC gets banned at your workplace.
      #206. You're so used to looking at DC stats pages that you make them for other areas of your computing existence.
      207 - 99% of available power in apartment is being used by DC computers. Any time anything else is turned on, fuses blow (yes this just happened to me)
      208 Your at an international airport and see limo drivers with signs reading "internet Security Systems" and hear the people they're picking up talking in German and autmomatically start wondering if their part of the DPC
      209 Your wife moves her office into your previously unheated garage for the winter
      210) Someone makes an obscure reference like the above, and you know exactly what DC project they are referring to. (ref to 197)
      211)You keep a spare parts bin so computer downtime is kept to a min

      212) you consider starting or joining a 12 step program after the latest project finishes
      213) (continued from 212) or, just read the ars msg bbs all day to find another project

      214) (not sure if this is in the list... but) you have your boxen send administrative alerts/msgs/pages to your phone/pager/pda in case of downtime :P
      215: With your family all packed into the car waiting to go to the airport for a 2 week vacation, you stand in front of your pharm and weigh the risk to benefit ratio of your OC'd [email protected]'s burning your house down when they fry to just switching the damn things off. You leave it on.
      #216 When you shut everything down for maintence, which inevitably takes 3 hours instead of 30 minutes, you decide that fixing things wasn't worth the lost WU's.
      #217 when you DO have to take things down for maintenance, you do it on the day when daylight savings gives you an extra hour, so that you can still get 24hrs of crunching time in on your machines.
      218 You crunch so many work units in so many projects, Mitsubishi names a SUV after you
      ...When you somehow become confused and think that DC is somehow terribly important
      219 You delurk for a thread like this, even if it isn't your home board220 You concider the possibilities of running DC on your cellphone(s
      221 You wake up in the morning and run to your machine to see how many WU you completed over night
      #222 You check your box before you kiss your wife hello and hug your kids when you get home from work.
      #223 Every night before you go to bed you make sure only your DC project is running so it has full reign of your idle cycles.
      224 - you get 18,000 hate e-mails/day because you exposed stats cheats
      225 - You give honours to a man for doing something absolutely worthless in terms of RL - battling cheaters...
      226 - You read nearly every damn thread in a FOREIGN forum of a COMPETITOR's team
      227 You eye your son's Furby[tm], wondering how many wu one might squeeze out of it
      #228 - You come home from a good dance at 0400, halfway drunk and groggy, and check all your DC links instead of going directly to bed


      • #4
        229 The Quad Xeon P III Server your crunching on has a 1 Gig hard drive in it. Anything larger would be a waste of money
        230 You are so concerned that your team's firepower is not being utilized properly, you start a "Flying Squad" just to get boxes on projects that need them.
        #231 You look at your Amigas wishing that ANY DC project would run on them.
        232: You are working on figuring out how to change a client so that it will run on your TI-81 (A new one would hold you up from getting a new computer faster!)
        232: You are working on figuring out how to change a client so that it will run on your TI-81 (A new one would hold you up from getting a new computer faster!)
        234: When approached about house-sitting for 3 months, you first think what kind of computer setup they have, and if they will notice the power consumption if you leave the computer on 24/7.
        235 When you compile your own linux client because the official one is still a few days away from being beta released.
        236 You left work early claiming to be sick because you remembered you forgot to start the client that morning.

        #237 You keep talking your wife out of having kids and making up excuses. But the truth is you can't afford a kid and your farm
        238 You try to talk your wife into another kid to justify building another box.

        #239 You try to come up with another reason to justify being a DC freak
        240 - The rigors of DC gauntlets cause you to revert to cannibalism
        241 - You spend a significant percentage of your DC-related time swapping jibes, cracks and barbs with opponents.

        #242 - You resort to stand-up comedy to generate Espirit de Corps (team spirit) and to keep your team's home thread active
        243 You measure your farm's upgrades in periods of weeks you'll have to eat ramen noodles
        244. You become a popular target for other DC freaks to pass & razz in the project standings
        247 You have dreams about finding the little green men and reporting them to berkley only to wait hours for confirmation and wake up right before they tell you.
        248 - You love DC so much that you are willing to use your precious CPU time to develop & compile a helper GUI application for other people to easily incease their WUs while sacrificing your own WU production.
        #249 - Caring more about the CPU time used to create said helper GUI application instead of hours of real-life time used in writing the code.
        #250 - Going home at lunch because your server is not responding and you are not sure if your cable-modem connection is down or the server has crashed (in which case you are losing WU production).
        251 - You design a special computer lab room in the new house you are building with seperate power circuits so you won't blow any fuses with the amount of computers you will have in there.

        #252 - You buy a dual-CPU machine so that you can use the extra CPU to exclusively run DC since your wife won't let you buy two seperate computers. Mu-hahahahaha.
        253 - You count the 12 processors, and only 4 machines in your office, and make plans to swap the p4 1.8 for a faster machine, and you use the 486 to keep the door open, but they ALL run DC
        254) You actually find the signal from the extraterrestrials in your WUs, but you delete it instead of sending it back to Berkeley because you don't want them to stop [email protected] ...
        255) You arrange your room so that you can lay in bed at night and stare at the banks of LEDs on your router and switch. Not only can you keep a sharp eye on your farm's status, but the flicking green dots seem to have a way of lulling you to sleep.
        256) As soon as you get home from work, you sit down at your box and VPN into their network. You then execute a batch file that sends a Wake-On-LAN command to all borged computers in the building. When asked why the computers were on in the morning, you tell everyone that you needed to take care of some maintance. Again.
        258. You do all your maintenance once every four years - every leap year, on February 29th
        259. You offer to fly to a foreign country, to duel on behalf of your team & home fora
        260. Your girlfriend desperately wants you to save every single penny so you can get married, buy a house, have kids and take two vacations a year, but you find yourself constantly pricing mobos and Athlons at work, wondering how many additional WUs you can squeeze out of it... and how you could sneak it into the apartment without her ever finding out and subsequently castrating you.
        262 At the request of fj in the TRS thread
        ... you are watching a movie on TV together with your wife, but you almost can't await the next ad break to have a look at the DCA and post some comments ...
        Taking a 15 mile spin into work to grab completed "sneakernet-nonet" WU,drop off some freshies (all via floppies, to get over the overnight hump) and return home with the cache - on your day off.)
        You run ECC2, OGR, DF, Seti, and RC5-72 all at the same time and if you were to consolidate all your boxen into one project you would have more computing power than the top 10 teams combined.
        266: To improve your stats in Project Dolphin (TSB), you type up creative writing assignments in notepad, to prevent any excess time from being taken away from RC5-72. (I am a sad person, non?)
        267) Your firewall logs show "" as having at least twice as many hits as everything else.
        268) Everytime you write your rent check, tears well up in your eyes as you realize you could have spent that money on three XP/mobo combos.
        268.b) Everytime you write your rent check you totally break down crying because you realize you could buy 5 P4/mobo combos
        269) You get a fully loaded P4 3.06GHz as an early Christmas present. Spend 2 hours loading the OS and updates and another hour tweaking it and overclocking it. Set up your favourite DC client on it and then go back to playing CS on your lowly AMD XP2100+ because you don't want to slow your ultimate gaming machine down from its true task...DC crunching
        Your computer is so loud it keeps you awake all night, but you leave it on overnight for the sake of "science".

        You refuse to replace the fans in your computer with quieter ones, because the money would be better spent on a new CPU, which would increase production.

        You spend a considerable length of time looking around your house for things to sell to finance a DC related upgrade
        You cut a 1 metre hole in your ceiling for the BIG fan to suck the heat out of your main home farm's room.

        You have to nail the computers, desks, chairs etc down so they don't stick to the ceiling.

        After a hard day's work, you are about to go to bed... you reach to turn off the only monitor you have and your finger stops a millimetre short of the box's power button ... you break out in a cold sweat realising you nearly stopped a cruncher


        • #5
          o sell to finance a

          DC related upgrade
          You cut a 1 metre hole in your ceiling for the BIG fan to suck the heat out of your main home

          farm's room.

          You have to nail the computers, desks, chairs etc down so they don't stick to the ceiling.

          After a hard day's work, you are about to go to bed... you reach to turn off the only monitor you

          have and your finger stops a millimetre short of the box's power button ... you break out in a

          cold sweat realising you nearly stopped a cruncher

          You can't sleep after that and have nightmares about ppl turning off boxen by mistake.
          277) The perpetual thundering of your farm lulls you to sleep every night
          278) You count Work Units, instead of sheep, when trying to lull yourself to sleep
          279) You set up a local mail server to collect your POP mail to save time when recieving it on

          your main cruncher

          280) You then set it to POP as infrequently as you can just so save that extra little juice, then

          doing the same with the mail server!!
          278b) You get pissed off because you don't have enough Work Units, and can't sleep
          278c) Since you can't sleep, you climb out of bed and use an unborged calculator to confirm that

          although you've cranked out over 20,000+ TeraFLOPS (20 quadrillion floating point operations) in

          the last 3 years, you're still a pathetic wimp compared to most of your DC peers & teammates
          282) You create 4 teams for the same DC project
          283) you have massive layoffs in your department, and you don't look at the resulting empty

          workstations as a crisis, but an opportunity
          284) You've done so much DC that it's not only altered your personality, it's also affected your

          physical appearance in very disturbing ways ...
          285) you come home think of this thread and revive it just cuz.
          286)between phase 1 and phase 2 of any given project you double your firepower even though the

          work units are more difficult
          287) You bump the thread once more because you cannot think of anything else worthwhile to say
          288)You spend buy an xp 2800+ and a compatible motherboard from newegg and then buy the

          motehrboard you want from a different site because enwegg is all out of the one you want.

          289)You spend over $2300 USD just to build a sweet crunching machine.

          290) You try to keep this thread alive with your own personal DC endeavors.
          291) You spend 3 days trying to get a diskless boot system up and running, so you can save a few

          watts worth of HDD power.

          292) On garbage day, you take the long way to work so you can troll for old computers to add to

          your farm. Bonus if you cross your own path more than twice.
          293) Every other post in your home DC thread is from you.

          294) You actually take challenges from other DCers seriously and do everything you can beat them.

          295) You check ADC every 5 minutes to see if anyone has replied to your thread and get disgusted

          and bored when no one has or someone has but not to your post.
          296) Out of 733 posts roughly 650 are to ADC threads
          297) You run stats for the second time, again for a project you don't run on your own machines.
          298) You "borrow" the look and feel of another stats persons site to generate those stats

          mentioned above. (Thanks Dyyryath )
          299) You constantly improve on those stats, because you're never quite satisfied with the way

          they work.
          300) You manage to come up with the 300th item in this god-forsaken thread.
          301) You decide to send one of your own crunchers to a colocation so that you can have more

          bandwidth for the stats that you run for a project you don't run
          302) You suggest to a fellow Ars DCer that they should have called their new born son GUIstav or

          dfGUIstav instead of what they actually named him (Gustav).
          that there's no mail service on President's Day, you seriously consider unpacking and

          reassembling everything to get another day's worth of WUs.
          304) Everytime you add or upgrade your boxen, you rearrange all of them so that the most powerful

          crunchers are always connected to your UPS units.
          304b) You lament that you only have 12 battery-backed outlets to work with.
          305) You hack and shovel your way through one of the worst blizzards on record for your region,

          just to restart your computers and get them crunching again.
          #306 Your computers have seperate summer and winter quarters.
          307 Your computers are in the room adjacent to your kitchen and when your standing next to your

          frigerator you can hear your computers over your fridge.
          #308 ARS tech has an entire forum solely dedicated to distributed computing(just making sure

          someone states the obvious)
          #309 You sit for 10 minutes trying to think of something to type to make it onto the "You know

          your a DC Freak when..." thread only to end up typing this in hopes someone will laugh at it.
          You seriously consider making a movie entitled revenge of the Freaks and a sequal Revenge of the

          Freaks, the DC story....
          311) You cyberstalk fellow DC Freaks around the fora ... in order to learn insider tips &

          pointers from them, and/or engage in "groupie-like" behavor
          you have other DCA members posting your freakish habits ^^
          #313 You learn to take lightly and as a grain of salt those people who are too critical of you at

          these fora.
          314 One must remember that we are all friends here
          314- Your electricity bill is almost as much as your rent.

          #315- You can't use your toaster because it is on the same circuit breaker as half your computers

          and it blows the circuit breaker everytime!!
          315-you take out your furnace to make more room for your farm.You haven't turned it on all year

          do to the detrimental effect it has on your farm anyways......
          317 You post to this list just to set the post-count straight ...
          316) You loot ... er ... reallocate ... an idle & dusty UPC from a neglected corner of the lab

          (at work), and quietly reallocate it to one of your borged work boxen, just to keep it running DC

          You post so often your psots collide with other people causing traffic jams and total world

          chaos(well, I like to think I'm that important anyway(called big-headed syndrome, but I digress))
          In the DC project your currently running it takes you 15 minutes to manually dump all of your

          work borgs every day.
          You buy a tv as big as a video wall so you can watch and check your DC progress without giving up

          your main role as a couch potato.
          PIP with digital inputs is yuppie dooo.
          You save screen shots of major DC milestones like some sort of demented geek photo album of

          treasured memories
          You think that's cool
          You actually reply to a thread where posts are counted in binary
          You laugh at all your previous posts hanging your head and thinking "It's true, it's so true..."
          You do more than one post at a time using binary post counts and are proud because you managed to

          post multiple binary numbers in a row without mistake.
          You think about creating a DC project to count how many posts in binary you make(it would be over

          in less than an hour and only require a 500 MHz processor)
          You actually think about the amount of processing power needed to complete your DC project
          You print milestones and keep the printouts in a huge pile next to your monitor!
          Your week gets ruined because you forget to print the milestone exactly on the even number
          101001100 - Who needs Paper? You have a folder on your server where you retain saved Web Pages
          from all the Stats Pages with your milestones on them
          You have your cpu OCed from 2.17 GHz to 2.8 GHz and it's still not fast enough for you, so you OC
          it some more and corrupt your system with all the reboots reinstall your OS and start all over
          again only to have to reinstall your OS again.
          334. (insert whatever the hell that is binary or hex or whatever here)
          You change schools (in district), but you still go back to the old one to see if the DC client is
          running, and are only pleased if it is running on all of comps in the lab.


          • #6
            335. You get mad at the cleaning people for plugging a vacuum cleaner into the same circuit as
            your farm, tripping the breaker. (cost 85 days uptime, too)
            336. You would have bought UPSs to protect against the above problem, but you used the money to
            buy a new farm box instead.
            337. Your car needed an oil change a few thousand miles ago, but you don't want to spend precious
            farm money on it.
            338. You invent a fictitious humor-based DC project, to stave off boredom and to help keep people
            amused and entertained in your DC community of choice
            339. Said project becomes popular among fellow DC Freaks, and threatens to spill over into
            reality ... with a real website, real pimpage, real participants, a downloadable client, and
            phony stats
            You offer to Benchmark above said Dc project.
            You're on the big H, the Horde.
            342. And you rewrite the load average call to report one less than the actual load average so the
            customers don't complain about the high load average on the web server.
            342. And you rewrite the load average call to report one less than the actual load average so the
            customers don't complain about the high load average on the web server.
            348: You convert the DC Freak thread into a massive text file.
            349: You realize the numbers in this thread are off by at least 25.
            350: You read this and you wonder "25 too high or 25 too low?"
            351: You start a repo business on the side, devoted to tracking down DC deadbeats
            352. You visit more than 3 dozen teams' forums to make sure you fall into their definition of
            "What is a DC Freak"
            353. You RMA a duff motherboard, but buy another one instead of waiting for the replacement.
            354. You turn off the real-time anti-virus to avoid excess disk I/O
            355. You organize the Very First DCDoS (Distributed Computing Denial of Service) to the servers
            at Berkeley by inundating them with a team dumpage of more than 12 times your normal daily WU,
            just as an April Fool's joke.
            356. When your heating bill is $0.00 because you have all those computers to do the heating for
            357. Electricity bill almost equals your mortgage payment.

            Oh yeah I got a problem!! :group:


            • #7
              Well that's all a bit deep for me but what is "DC"? :confused as hell:


              • #8
                Originally posted by Wiggo
                Well that's all a bit deep for me but what is "DC"? :confused as hell:
                Distributed Computing. Ie. [email protected] and all the rest.


                • #9
                  :o Was just plain too tired to think.


                  • #10
                    My son IM'd this to me the other day. He came across it at [H]ardocp.

                    Well it had to happen. I got home the other night from visiting my new grandson and my youngest son informed me I had missed all the excitement. When asked "What excitement ?" He said the local officers of the law had just been there. When I asked him what he had been up to he said, "they were looking for you!"
                    It seems one of my neighbors had turned us in for having a "Meth" lab in the house. After all, why else would there be fans running in the open windows all winter long? And besides there are cars there all the time. (I have six kids and they like to visit )
                    The Police must not have been too worried because they apologized to my son and he laughed his butt off and showed them a couple of the labs, er, bedrooms with machines folding away. One of the detectives knew my brother and also thought he had heard I was in to computers. Brian told them I only had 40 at the house.
                    Thought you guys would understand the humor. Most people say "Your windows are open in the winter? With fans?"

                    -Mike "

                    This was regarding another DC project, but, the "commitment is the same."



                    • #11
                      I would've loved to have seen the cops faces when they had first see the lab. :rofl:


                      • #12
                        Indeed. Like, what kind of nut lives here? He has to be up to something wrong!


                        • #13
                          I know the looks that I see when ppl walk into this room. :devil win