OK...Secret Mens' Business

[Synthetic]

Evil NO

playful ... yes
sexy... definitely yes
understanding of the male ethic.... yes
sexy... yes
a mother when we need it ...yes
a lover (of the ***** variety or otherwise) when we want one....yes
did I mention sexy????
but most of all a friend. a confidante, someone we trust...YES
did I mention sexy????

anyway...now that we can't have that...what about....hmmmm (haven't worked that out yet.....and I doubt I will)

what about sexy?
and i agree with...umm...u. and..well every male in here:)
argh! fukn women....whats with their mind games? thats the worst....

[Wiggo's-sister]

I have to agree with you whole heartedly Oldbugger.

I only have one problem, cant help ya out with the sexy bit, you have to make that choice.

Maybe if you guys would concertrate a little bit more on what we're saying then you would understand us and it wouldnt sound like mind games

[Mr. C]

1. make our own food
2. clean our own place (laundry etc)
3. masturbate more.

thats about it.

So your saying the biggest difference is no one would harp on me about spending all day in front of the computer:?:

[Wiggo's-sister]

Nothing wrong with doing that Mr C, I do it :D

[Kay]

The very biggest difference seems to be the listening arguement, we like to talk things over, guys seem to like taking direct action, we get very annoyed when you guys brush us off and wont listen.......and i don't mean the pretence of listening with the occasional nod of the head, I mean really listen to what we say, we don't need a solution, we just need you to communicate

[Wiggo's-sister]

Well said dear *nods head*

[Beefy]

hehehe.. this thread sounds like fun.. no-one pay any serious attention to what I have to say here...

Men don't listen enough to women? You'd be surprised how hard it is to listen to complaints for around 8 hours of the day.. Get up in the morning.. whine whine whine.. go to work and get some peace... come home at night, whine whine whine... go to bed (alone, of course).... etc...

That's another thing.. when there's a fight, why do guys always get kicked out on the couch? COS WE ARE BEING CONSIDERATE! even though there was just a huge argument, guys are nice enough to go off somewhere else, and let the lady have the bed..

Umm.. what else...


I'll think of something...

[Kay]

good thing you found your couch to hide behind beefy.......you are going to need it very soon :(

[Beefy]

oh, so it's not enough that I have to sleep on it, now i'm being forced to hide behind it? what's next?

[Kay]

an apology? You know sooner or later you are going to make one

[Beefy]

'i don't think so.. I haven't done anything wrong..'

that seems to be what we say all the time, isn't it? and most of the time it's actually true.. we try to please, but when women change their minds every 2 minutes, it makes things hard. Then when we ask what we did wrong, you don't tell us. which is just stupid really... how are you supposed to resolve something when you don't know what is wrong? then you get really really moody (more than usual.. however you manage to achieve that..) and don't talk to us at all..

[Wiggo's-sister]

Ive never kicked the other half out of the bed, its big enough for both of us!!!

[Beefy]

obviously haven't had much of a fight then.. good for you.. :thumb:

[Kay]

Its the other way around at my house :(

[Andy]

i was gonna put this in the jokes thread but i think its mopre appropriate here:
_________________________________

a note from men to women
_________________________________

1. If you think you are fat, you probably are. Do not ask us. We refuse to answer.

2. Learn to work the toilet seat. If it's up, Put it down.

3. Do not cut your hair. Ever. Long hair is always more attractive than short hair. One of the big reasons guys fear getting married is that married women always cut their hair, and by then, you are stuck with her.

4. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see if we can find the perfect present yet again!

5. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to; expect an answer you do not want to hear.

6. Sometimes, we are not thinking about you. Live with it.

7. Do not ask us what we are thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as navel lint, the shotgun formation and monster trucks.

8. Sunday = sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

9. Shopping is not a sport, and no, we are never going to think of it that way.

10. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really.

11. You have enough clothes.

12. You have too many shoes.

13. Crying is blackmail.

14. Your ex-boyfriend is an idiot.

15. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work. Strong hints do not work. Obvious hints do not work. Just say it!

16. No, we do not know what day it is. We never will. Mark anniversaries on a calendar.

17. Most guys own three pairs of shoes-what makes you think we'd be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your dress?

18. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

19. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That is what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

20. Foreign films are best left to foreigners.

21. Check your oil.

22. It is neither in your best interest nor ours to take the quiz together.

23. No, it does not matter which quiz.

24. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. All comments become null and void after 7 days.

25. If something we said could be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

26. You can either ask us to do something OR tell us how you want it done-not both.

27. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

28. Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we.

29. The relationship is never going to be like it was the first two months we were going out.

30. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like windows default settings. Peach is a fruit, not a color.

31. If it itches, it will be scratched.

32. If it is OUR house, I do not understand why MY stuff gets thrown in the closet/attic/basement.

33. We are not mind readers and we never will be. Our lack of mind-reading ability is not proof of how little we care about you.

34. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.